Does Your Calla Lily Have Petal Deficit Disorder?

‘’Imagine with me for a moment that everyone in the world has been suddenly transformed into a flower. Some of us are petunias, some are begonias, others of us are tulips, and some are daisies. Now, I want you to imagine that in this culture of flowers, the psychiatrists are the roses.

Let’s take a peek into the professional life of the rose psychiatrist as her first patient of the day enters her office. It happens to be a calla lily. The rose psychiatrist goes right to work administering a diagnostic battery of tests, including measuring the circumference of the calla lily’s white spathe, the diameter of his yellow spadix, the number of green leaves he has, and the overall length of the entire plant. The doctor takes a chlorophyll biopsy and sends it to the lab. Then she has the calla lily fill out the RRSF, or Rose Rating Scale for Flowers, which she herself developed, asking questions like: “how would you rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 regarding your desire to grow in a plot of sandy loam somewhere?’’ and ‘’have you ever caused swelling, diarrhea, or stomach pain in an animal from having eaten a piece of you?’’

Finally, after all the tests are completed, the Rose psychiatrist sits the calla lily down in the garden bed waiting room and gives her diagnosis: “I’m afraid I have some bad news for you. You have PDD, or petal deficit disorder. We believe it’s genetic and can be passed on to your children. We don’t quite know what causes it. We think it’s a chemical disorder of some kind. But with proper treatment using this Miracle Gro® product called ‘’Petal-In’’™ we believe you can learn to live a successful and productive life on the banks of a sandy stream or pond somewhere. The calla lily was stunned by the news, but took the product offered stoically and went off to his new destiny in the world as a disordered flower.’’

Is this what we’re doing to millions of children in America?

Read my book Neurodiversity in the Classroom: Strength-Based Strategies to Help Students with Special Needs Succeed in School and Life .